My Spouse Built Me Up When He Could Have Torn Me Down

The fateful day – built up or torn down?

My friend thought Dave might tear me down; instead he built me up. The day I backed the car out of the “garage” was a recipe for embarrassment. My friend was visiting me and she and I were heading to town. I hopped into the car and turned around to put some items into the back seat. Putting the car into reverse, I glanced toward my friend as the car moved backwards.

I heard the impact, felt the car shudder and braked to a sudden stop. The door of the car bent completely forward! Obviously, I forgot to close the car door before I backed out of the garage. Now the door did not close correctly; it could not even latch.

And the response is . . .

I knew I did not need to fear Dave’s anger, but I was so embarrassed in front of my friend. Understandably, she and I were anxiously wondering what Dave’s reaction would be. Is he going to tease me or show his frustration? Will he tear me down or build me up?

I called Dave at work to tell him about my debacle. To my relief, once Dave was assured that my friend and I were not injured, he told me to not  worry about the car door, that things can be fixed!

I anxiously waited for him to arrive home after work. Expectedly, he methodically examined the door, now hopelessly sprung on its hinges. After forcibly closing the door and latching it, he turned toward me.

Our friend nervously stood in the background as we waited for his response. My husband gave me a smile and a hug as he took me in his arms. “You are the cutest door-bender in Halifax County”, he said with a smile. When he could have torn me down, he built me up. I blushed, and I felt loved.

He was right

That was all. The car went to the shop, and he paid the bill.  I never heard a word about my mistake again, except when I mentioned it. He always told me to forget about the door. Sometimes I still remember, and sometimes we still talk about what happened.

The car is long gone. The place we lived was torn down years ago. The money spent on that bill is a distant memory. Yet, I will never forget how I could have been shamed – and wasn’t. How he could have teased me or humiliated me – and he didn’t. I will never forget how he made a conscious choice: when he could have torn me down, he chose to build me up.